tea & colour

"Peace I leave with you, My peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. 

Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid." John 14:27

Allowed to grow in grace

"All teachers, pastors and evangelists make mistakes. Even the apostle Peter made such a serious mistake that he led the believers in Antioch into hypocrisy, and Paul had to rebuke him publicly (Gal 2:11-21) Why can’t we show prophets the same mercy? Why should prophetic ministry be the only ministry that is not allowed a single mistake, and prophets the only ones not allowed to grow in grace?" Jack Deere, The Beginner's Guide to the Gift of Prophecy, p136.

photo album

memories are like books
heavier than they look
~E.S, Jan 2017.

I made a photo album. It is pretty exciting. Maybe in the future I can take it out and flip through it. I'll remember the faces, the smiles, the pain, and the healing. Maybe I can show it to my kids someday, if the Lord gives me kids of my own. I can say to them "This is what Mum looked like in 2016. It was a tough year in many ways. But God helped me get through it. See how He blessed me and healed me in so many ways?
And see how He blesses and heals me now."

May I always be testifying of God's great goodness in Jesus to whoever God brings into my life!

I called to Him and He answered

I poured out my heart to God. Tears, everything.
At the end of it all, as I was praying in tongues, He showed me these words by the power of His blessed Holy Spirit—His Word, His very Word: "Call to me, and I will answer you, and show you great and mighty things, which you do not know." This is the Word of the Lord, found in Jeremiah 33:3.
God knew exactly what I needed to hear. And I'm not kidding when I say this was exactly what I needed to hear in that moment, and God, divinely good, all-knowing and so full of love for me, brought it to the forefront of my mind.
Praise and glory to the Lord Jesus Christ, who gave me access to the Father by the Spirit. (Eph 2:18)

the Lord looks at the heart

When they entered, [Samuel] looked at Eliab and thought, "Surely the Lord's anointed is before Him."
But the Lord said to Samuel, "Do not look at his appearance or at the height of his stature, because I have rejected him; for God sees not as man sees, for man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart."
1 Samuel 16:6-7 NASB

Released.

Released. Is this what it feels like? I feel like how i felt back at that crusaders conference when i was in year 8. Just so free at the thought and the sound and the taste of God's love. Free to declare it. Free to pray big prayers. Big confident passionate prayers without being embarrassed about it. Just go out there are do it. Just go for it. Cos God is with me. It's not about the head any more. It's about the heart. And i feel liberated to love Christ more and serve Him refreshed and excited about what He's gonna do and how He's gonna work. What miracles He will do and what revelations He will give. It's really exciting. I'm that girl under the stars again at the end of Year 8. I'm that girl lying awake in the middle of the night in Christchurch NZ six years ago, lying awestruck at the wonder of God. I'm no longer trapped in the cage of my own emotional trauma and despair...I was trapped in there by my own devices for three years trying to put my hope in a human master when my heavenly Master was telling me I'm already free to trust Him and serve Him. But i was just holding onto the lies that my own flesh and Satan were feeding me. I was clinging to emotion rather than letting the Word transform my emotions. I was trying to give it to God but my mind and heart were in constant conflict, perpetual struggle and i was just wearing myself out.
But God has freed me. Thank you thank you Lord.
He's delivered me, He does deliver me and I trust He will deliver me still.
Lord Jesus I love you so.

9/1/17 1:30am

He will still deliver us

"Yes, we had the sentence of death in ourselves, that we should not trust in ourselves but in God who raises the dead, who delivered us from so great a death and does deliver us; in whom we trust that He will still deliver us." 

2 Corinthians 1:9-10